As Long As I'm Living
by Shrine Maiden Kitty
Summary: Living with an abusive yami can be tough. Ryou, now almost completely lost inside of himself, will do ANYTHING to be loved… even if that means sacrificing EVERYTHING…


Summary: Living with an abusive yami can be tough. Ryou, now almost completely lost inside of himself, will do ANYTHING to be loved... even if that means sacrificing EVERYTHING...  
  
Kitty: sigh  
  
Bakura: What's the matter with you? Not like I care...  
  
Kitty: I'm just sorta bummed about getting my first flame... in like 2 or 3 years... or however long I've been part of Fanfiction.net...  
  
Bakura: You mean that illiterate git that insulted you like a lame toddler? Get over it.  
  
Ryou: eating pizza Be nice Bakura.  
  
Bakura: where the heck did you come from you freaky little man?!  
  
Ryou: -.-'  
  
Kitty: seemingly over her grief RYOU!!! glomp  
  
Ryou: O.o Onto the fic... gasp  
  
As Long As I'm Living  
  
Ch1: Rain  
  
Rain. The rain was falling from the sky. It touched my cool lips and ran through my eyelashes. It pounded into the ground, awakening the earthworms from their dormant states in their burrows underground. It flooded the streets, keeping everyone safe and warm in their homes, not wanting to risk the storm. The rain was what had lured me outside today. Now I, wet, shivering, and lost, stared up into the sky, and watched as each raindrop fell. My face was soaked, but being able to tell the difference between raindrops and tears was nearly impossible.  
  
My light hair hung limply into my eyes, but I felt too weak to even push it away. Why is this happening to me? I thought sullenly to myself as lightning streaked the sky dangerously, followed by a loud crackle of thunder. I blinked the tears and rain away from my light blue eyes, trying to get a grip on reality. The rain water washed away the blood from my face; blood that had come from a series of gashes on my left cheek. The stinging sensation left me numb in the face and I ignored the dulling pain.  
  
This was my life on a daily basis. This is what I endured every day. My soul was breaking with each passing second, and there was no one to help me ease my pain.  
  
I had run out into the storm foolishly after another beating from my yami. Sometimes I just can't comprehend what I've done to anger him so. Most of the time I'm pretty certain that I haven't done anything at all, aside from crossing his path while he was in a foul mood. Which was almost always. It's becoming increasingly more difficult to keep an optimistic aura while I'm still alive. In fact, I've become quite the pessimist in such a short number of months.  
  
I miss the days from which I used to have friends. The days where I lived such a normal life like every other teen. It pains me so to watch happy children playing and laughing every time I walk past the playground on the way home from school. I know I shouldn't be so jealous, but my envy has quickly grown to hatred and I seethe in anger at their fickle naïveté. They are so blind toward the world laid out before them. They have no idea what the future holds for their fragile lives. What will bestow them later on in life? Poverty? Pain? Possibly abuse? Maybe they will be one of the lucky ones and lead a flawless life full of jubilance and love. Maybe that will not be the case. But in any scenario, I don't know what any of their futures hold, and frankly I do not care.  
  
But now I'm becoming bitter toward the innocent, and that is not right. What have I become in such short time? I don't understand. What has this absence of love and care done to my whole life up to this breaking point?  
  
My mind continues to wander as I remember that if I don't get home soon my yami will be doubly upset with me. I do not wish to have a repeat of earlier.  
  
I turn around slowly and my house stares back at me ominously. I was certain I had walked farther than just to my front sidewalk. I guess I was more lost than I had thought. Perhaps I was never lost at all.  
  
I walked up the steps of my front porch and cast one last wistful look towards the sky and kissed the rain good-bye. Sometimes something so dark can be comforting, no matter how dangerous it may seem.  
  
To Be Continued...  
  
Kitty: Meh, so how was that for a first chapter? Short and depressing, I know. Oh well. It may as well have been an epilogue. But whatever. Anyway, please review. I will need at least 3 reviews for the start of chapter 2. Arigatou!  
  
Ryou: At least it was, err, interesting?  
  
Bakura: You're a psycho, you know that? ...Who are you?  
  
Ryou: -.-'  
  
WOO WOO REVIEW 


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